NFL is nearing the end of the season!
Introduction: Mike had a terrible night – he had a high school officiating gig and reported to the wrong school, brought the wrong officiating jacket, and forgot towel. He ended up taking a ghetto shower and told a story from his childhood how he showered in the locker room of the public pool as a child and dried off with the cloth hand towel that turns in the dispenser near the sink.
Lance had a public service announcement about Cherry Picking. This is the issue where a rube will only quote specific stats instead of all applicable stats. Only the measurable that support their take are brought up, and not the measurable that argue against it. We all know Rubes that do this.
Mike - LiAngelo Ball pulled from UCLA by his dufus dad, and he won’t be playing in college. Getting ready for the NBA draft, even though a few GMs have come out and said LiAngelo isn’t anywhere to be seen on draft boards. What is this guy doing?
Lance had a couple good Tweets and Mike had a couple great Tweets about crying in the NBA. The guys discussed the nature of officiating, as well as how childish the NBA players are with calls/no calls. Fans are tired of it and it affects the ratings.
Mike – Olympics: Russians are out. State sponsored doping. Both Rubes are happy that the International Olympic Committee showed some sack and banned Russia due to its cheating. We are happy that the clean Russian athletes will be able to participate in the Olympics under a generic Olympic banner, and not needlessly punished and banned from competition.
Mike nailed nailed three out of the four teams and called Alabama getting in and the SEC having two teams. Lance called two of the four teams correct. The four teams in to the playoffs are Clemson, Oklahoma, Georgia, Alabama.
Top non-playoff bowl matchups we are excited about:
Mike: Bowl season begins December 16 with a full slate of games, but which am I most looking forward to?
Scotty Terrible Take: Twitter take from a random Rube. We call this Rube out for his rubidity. It just happens to be from the lead analyst of Pro Football Focus. After the Atlanta/Vikings game, this cat said Rhodes had a lot of open room in his coverage against Julio Jones, even though Julio had 2 catches for 24 yards. Congrats on your Terrible Take!
Trey Wingo had a bad tweet too, saying Ju-Ju Smith-Scheuster’s hit on Burfict wasn’t wrong and that it was a bang-bang play. Clearly, Mr. Wingo doesn’t know what bang-bang means, because Smith-Scheuster lined him up for five steps before leveling Burfict.
The Rubes argued about who the best cornerback in the NFL is. Lance thinks it’s Xavier Rhodes. Mike thinks it’s Patrick Peterson.
Uber Rube Johnny Martinez from Phoenix – he and Mike had a great conversation, where Johnny was super fired up about the show. “I realized as I listened to a few shows, that I’m a rube”, Johnny said. Self-realization is what this show is all about. We are all rubes.
Mike - Kansas City lost again, now having dropped 6/7. Is KC still going to win the division? Lance thinks they will. Mike wondered when fans jump ship on this disastrous season. Some have already started to see the writing on the wall. Losing at the Jets is a true low point in the season and in Coach Reid’s career.
Lance – he liked that the Chiefs turned the play-calling over to the offensive coordinator and the Chiefs put up a crap ton of yards (though Lance forgets that Kansas City lost). He also talked about how disappointing Cam Newton has been this season. Lance believes Case Keenum is worthy of NFL MVP consideration. Garoppolo is a great quarterback. In two years the Patriots will regret trading him away.
Mike - Cordarrelle Patterson – 4 catches, 97 yards. Led his team to victory. What an impact.
Lance – AFC and NFC true contenders. There are only 2 real contenders in the AFC. Whoever wins the Pittsburgh Steelers versus New England game will go to the Super bowl due to the home field advantage. NFC there are six teams that could go to the Super Bowl, including the Saints and Seahawks. Mike pointed out that based on Vegas odds, the Vikings have the fifth best odds to win the Super Bowl. Minnesota Vikings with the best record in the league, but only the 5th best odds to win the Super Bowl (behind Patriots, Eagles, Steelers, and Saints). The Chiefs and the Chargers have the same odds to win it all as the Vikings do, LOL.
Mike - What is going on with the Giants, it’s like Reese the GM and McAdoo the coach didn’t want to keep their jobs.
Mike - NFC West strikes again, proving that playing out west makes for some of the hardest places to play. This time, the NFL’s best team went down at Seattle. Why are some teams not allowed to play out west?
Most significant game of the coming weekend (Week 13):
Lance – Lance agrees with Mike.
Mike – Philly at Rams. We’ve proven that the West is tough to play, and the Rams are a good team. If Philly loses this, they lose a toehold on the bye and the Rams strengthen their resume. Since Lance took Mike’s game, he went with Kansas City/Oakland Raiders. Thinks it will be a shootout and a great game. The Chiefs are favored by four points at home.
Shot in the Dark –
Last week, Lance got his Shot in the Dark correct, whereas Mike didn’t.
Mike - Washington Redskins goes into Los Angeles Chargers as 6 point dogs, buts surprises the Chargers with an untimely loss, putting LA behind the 8-ball. Again, Lance took Mike’s game so he went on the fly with a different game. Dallas at New York Giants, and thinks the Giants will win this outright.
Lance – Los Angeles Chargers/Washington game.
NFL Locks of the week -
Again this week, the Rubes select the games for the other to break down.
Mike went 1-1-1 and Lance went 2-1 on last week’s picks.
Lance – Minnesota at Carolina. Minnesota is favored by 2.5 points. This is a test for Minnesota. Case Keenum will step up as always. Minnesota to cover.
Mike – Jacksonville, favored by 3, hosting Seattle. The question is: Can the Jags contain Russell Wilson. Take Jacksonville and give up the 3 points.
Lance – Philadelphia Eagles at LA Rams. This will separate the pretender form the contender. The Rams will win this game as Philly enters a free fall and give up the 2.5 points.
Mike – Washington at Los Angeles Chargers. Washington gets 6 points. The Chargers have been playing well, and Washington is hit and miss. Take Washington and the 6 points.
Lance – New England at Miami, with the Patriots favored by 11.5 points and Gronkowski is out. Lance likes New England to cover in this one. Patriots will blow them out. Give up the points.
Mike – Green Bay going to Cleveland. Packers are favored by 3.5 points. Take Green Bay and give up the 3.5 points. Kizer, the Cleveland quarterback, is a disaster. Lance predicts Green Bay loses straight up to the Browns.
Mike's Introduction: I was on my way to work a college game (Lance and I are basketball officials), and I had a lot of road time ahead of me. I stumbled upon a podcast (Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History). I listened to episode #60, The Celtic Holocaust. It’s a 6-hour show and delves into serious history. Dan mentioned something called The Wicker Man, ancient druids of the Celtic tradition would use these to please the gods. I started thinking that we need a wicker man for all of Lance’s bad sports takes. That’s my holiday wish.
We review NCAA football, because we don’t want NFL to completely dominate our show. Some headlines:
Lance brought up the Greg Schiano controversy during the Tennessee Volunteers coaching search. Lance stated that he didn’t know why the social media uproar existed. Mike clarified by reading the following:
“The putative reason for Schiano’s unpopularity was a 2015 deposition by Penn State whistleblower Mike McQueary, who testified under oath that he’d heard that Schiano had witnessed Jerry Sandusky “doing something with a boy” and done nothing.” From theringer.com, written by Michael Bauman.
Lance remained confused.
The Rubes review the Power Five conferences and picking the conference championship games:
Mike - #11 USC at #21 Stanford. I’m surprised Washington couldn’t make this game. Stanford is an average, 3-loss team. USC is favored by 3 and is by far offensively superior. USC wins this and covers. And will not qualify for the playoff at 11-2.
Lance – agrees with Mike.
Lance – easy victory for Oklahoma and will be in the playoffs.
Mike - #4 Oklahoma at #12 TCU: great game. TCU can play spoiler, but I don’t think they will. Oklahoma, with their crass quarterback Baker Mayfield, will roll the Horned Frogs. Oklahoma favored by 7.
Mike - #6 Auburn at #7 Georgia. It warms my heart that Alabama isn’t in this game, but will they be in the playoffs anyway? Georgia shouldn’t have a loss, and at 11-1 they won’t have another. Georgia takes it. Auburn favored by 2.5
Lance – Lance picks Auburn to beat Georgia. They are rolling coming off the Alabama win.
Lance – used to live in Florida and thinks he’s an expert because of it. Lance likes Clemson to win everything this year, so he picks them to beat Miami in this game. But, he doesn’t think they will cover the 9.5.
Mike - #2 Miami at #3 Clemson: Miami chunked one up to Pittsburgh last week, in a classic choke job. But, if they beat Clemson they have a great argument for the playoffs. I think Clemson is dangerous, but Miami has swag. I’ll take the Hurricanes even though Clemson is favored by 9.5.
Mike - #5 Wisconsin against #9 Ohio State: Wisconsin undefeated but disrespected, and 6-point underdogs. They shouldn’t be on the same field as the top-shelf Buckeyes, but they’ll beat them on Saturday. Wisconsin.
Lance – he is torn on this game because he doesn’t want to see Ohio State make the playoffs. Also, being from Minnesota he dislikes Wisconsin sports. He decides that he wants Wisconsin to win and wants the six points.
Mike - No Pac12 or ACC presence.
Lance – he discusses a dozen different scenarios but doesn’t make a prediction. Typical rube.
Lance thinks the playoffs should expand to 12 teams and Mike thinks it should be 8 teams. Mike pointed out the potential matchups in the first round of a 12 team playoff and discussed how bad some of them would be. A 12 team playoff would dilute too much.
Scott’s Terrible Takes:
This week’s terrible take is from Scott himself. Before the last game, the Minnesota Gophers extended PJ Fleck after they lost in a shut out game. Scott supports it, even though the team lost 4 more games this season and wasn’t the least bit competitive. Mike pointed out that the Purdue Boilermakers finished 6-6 with Jeff Brohm, 3-9 last season. Had success at Western Kentucky. They didn’t extend him yet, why did MN extend PJ Fleck after a miserable season? However, Scott loves it. So bad.
Mike – Oakland Raiders/Denver Broncos fight. Lance was upset because Michael Crabtree got tossed and Lance lost in fantasy football because of it. Mike pointed out that no reasonable fantasy football owner relies on Crabtree anyway.
Mike - Kansas City crumbling: I called it. Lost 5/6 games. Alex Smith with a 77-passer rating over the past 4 games. Do you still think KC wins the AFC West? Lance says yes, he thinks they will still win the AFC West. Mike thinks Oakland will come back and win the division.
Mike – Cordarrelle Patterson with the game winning catch. He is a true impact player for the Raiders.
Mike - Has the Atlanta Falcons offense finally figured it out and peaking at the right time? Lance doesn’t know, but he thinks everyone will find out this week when the Falcons play the Minnesota Vikings in the NFL’s game of the week.
Mike - Who is the odds-on favorite for the final AFC playoff spot?
Next was a bit that Mike likes to call LOL, as in some of Lance’s takes are just hilarious: Lance thought Marcus Mariota will be the top fantasy QB.
Mike thought Tom Brady, who was top 5.
LOL: Lance’s shot in the dark SF to beat Seattle.
Mike’s shot in the dark is Buffalo upends KC straight up. NAILED IT!
Playoff Implication matchups:
Philadelphia at Seattle:
Minnesota at Atlanta
Carolina at New Orleans:
Shot in the Dark:
Lance – red hot Philadelphia Eagles team is going to Seattle. Lance goes with Seattle to upset the Eagles on the west coast. Squeak it out on a last second field goal from Blair Walsh. Mike agrees because playing NFC West teams on the road are tough for every NFL team.
Mike - just when we think the Oakland Raiders might be figuring it out, in comes a scrappy New York Giants team. Raiders are favored by 7 at home, but the Giants win straight up.
Locks of the week:
The guys pick each other’s game to Lock.
Mike – Green Bay in a pick-em against Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Mike hates Dirk Koetter as a coach so much, that on that principle alone he goes with Green Bay here.
Lance – Kansas City Chiefs at New York Jets. Lance thinks the Chiefs have figured it out, and they get their stuff together. Take KC and give up the 3.5 points.
Mike – New Orleans Saints hosting the Carolina Panthers. Saints are favored by 4 points. Saints are coming off a tough loss. Mike thinks they’ve peaked already and are trending down. Carolina is on more of a curve upward. Take the Panthers and the points.
Lance - LA Rams at Arizona. Rams are favored by 6.5 points. Lance takes the Rams to cover.
Mike – Oakland home against the New York Giants. Oakland is favored by 7 points. Mike takes Oakland and gives up the seven points.
Lance - Minnesota at Atlanta. The Falcons are favored by three points at home. Xavier Rhodes will shut down Julio Jones. Take Minnesota and the points.
Mike points out that there were a lot of bad takes from Lance today, filling up the Wicker Man.
Rube Sports Radio #16
Getting you ready for the NFL playoffs:
Rube Mike makes a public service announcement. A couple days ago, Cheryl Reeve, Head Coach of the Minnesota Lynx, posted a picture on Twitter. She’s on a much-deserved vacation. But, it brings to the forefront a social media issue we find with a lot of women, posting pictures from the beach and showing their bare feet. It’s enough. I’m here to tell all people, men and women, that none of your feet are cute and nobody wants to see them. It’s appalling.
The Rubes do a bit, since it’s the week of Thanksgiving, they each list off three things they are each thankful for in sports:
Top college basketball storylines:
Scotts Terrible Takes: he’s like the guy in high school who brought a bottle of booze to school and tried to get you to take a drink in between classes.
Scott continues his streak with 3-in-a-row. This week his take is that Scott has started a pick-em game against the spread for Gophers basketball games, but everybody said they didn’t want to play. That hasn’t deterred Scott, though. He continues to send updates that show everyone in the text thread is winless and he has picked a couple right. Essentially, Scott has a losing record against himself.
Update on NFL football playoff predictions:
AFC top seeds:
Lance: Pittsburgh, Patriots, Kansas City, Tennessee Titans, Jacksonville at #5, and Oakland at #6.
New England Patriots – as always, they are awesome and Brady’s arm should be cloned and parents allowed to have the gene spliced into their child’s DNA. They have the best coach and the best QB.
Pittsburgh Steelers – continues to win with a suspect team. Doesn’t feel like a real super bowl contender.
Jacksonville Jaguars – right on the money. They continue to win games and perform expertly on defense, but hard to trust that they are going to get a playoff win because Brutal Blake Bortles is under center.
Oakland Raiders. This is looking more like a solid possibility that Oakland will sneak in but only if they figure out the offensive woes. I claimed Derek Carr was the second coming of Jim Plunkett, but he’s looking more like the second coming of Jim Carey in football pads. Let’s talk about Marshawn Lynch. He stands to honor Mexico, which is a country undergoing much social resistance. It is now, and has full of police corruption and murders. The government is thought to not be protecting its people from cartels, lack basic human rights, and the rule of law. Yet he stands for that but not for the United States. What is the message?
Kansas City Chiefs: as I suspected, the Chiefs are falling apart. Coach Andy Reid has made his bed and now he, and all the Chief fans, must sleep in the unwashed sheets. Alex Smith should have been benched weeks ago (as I was calling for).
Titans: no chance they do anything with Mariota coughing up the football like it’s a bolus of half chewed steak.
Top Seeds: Eagles – best team in the league.
Vikings – how will this team respond on the road, and when will the real Case Keenum show up? They have the upper hand on getting the other bye, but will Zimmer coach his way out of it?
Rams: exposed a bit on the road in Minnesota. Have to win out to have a legitimate chance of getting the bye.
Saints – one of the hottest teams in the league since Week 2.
Panthers – sneaky dangerous to get home field in the Wildcard and really the only threat to Minnesota for the bye.
Cowboys – I continue to be wrong about them. When will I stop being fooled?
Philadelphia Eagles, Minnesota Vikings, New Orleans Saints, Los Angeles Rams at #4, Carolina at #5 and Detroit Lions at #6.
Top Playoff implication:
Mike - Minnesota at Detroit – the Vikings finally go on the road but face a Lions team in a questionable state. They just aren’t very good. But, they can score. Minnesota is coming off an emotional win and on short rest need to play on the road. This feels like a trap game for the Vikings. Minnesota will win the division regardless, but they need this game to be taken seriously for the bye.
Lance – New Orleans at LA Rams. One of the teams will stay in contention for the final bye spot.
Top fantasy QB –
Mike: Tom Brady
Lance: Marcus Mariota
NFL Shot in the Dark –
Lance: San Francisco beats Seattle in Seattle.
Mike: Tyrod Taylor has something to prove, and prove it he will on the road at a crumbing Kansas City team that is doubting if Coach Andy Reid still has all his faculties. Buffalo wins in a run away in what is Alex Smith’s final game in KC.
NFL Locks of the week – Mike picks the games for Lance to pick, and vice/versa.
Last week, Lance went 3-0 and Mike went 1-2.
Mike: Minnesota at Detroit. Vikings are favored by 3. It is an easy pick. Take Minnesota and give up the points.
Lance: Los Angeles Chargers at Dallas. Chargers are favored by 1. Take Los Angeles and give up the point.
Mike: Jacksonville Jaguars at Arizona Cardinals. Jacksonville is favored by 4.5 points. Take Jacksonville and give up the points.
Lance: New Orleans at Los Angeles Rams. Rams are favored by 2.5. Take the Saints and the points.
Mike: San Francisco at Seattle. Seattle is favored by 6.5 points. There is no doubt here, but take Seattle and give up the points. It’s the most likely outcome.
Lance: Buffalo at Kansas City Chiefs. Chiefs are favored by 10. Kansas City will win the game, no doubt about that. Take Buffalo and the points.
NFL is approaching the most exciting time of the year!
Lance Nelson and Mike Paulus are your hosts.
Intro – Rube Sports Radio deserves to sit back a bit and pause, because we’ve accomplished something not a lot of podcasters have. Certainly something that a lot of potential podcasters have dreamed of. This is Episode #15. I was listening to the podcast Art of Charm, and on Episode 668 they talked about how our culture celebrates starting and celebrate finishing, but the hard part, the part where most people fail, is the middle. Specifically, to podcasts, they stated the statistic is that most podcasters quit by episode #13. And we’ve exceeded that. So, let’s celebrate like the Cleveland Browns.
Rube Lance announced a Rube Cave contest. Go to our twitter or facebook page and send us a picture of your Rube Cave. The best cave gets a Rube Sports Radio t-shirt.
The guys had to address the Case Keenum/Teddy Bridgewater debate. It has gone national. Lance thinks there shouldn’t even be a debate. The Minnesota Vikings should ride Case Keenum, as he’s the hot hand. Mike believes theres no way Teddy should see the field, but believes Teddy will be pressed into action due to a Case injury and it’s better to get him on the field sooner than later. You already know what Case Keenum is. He’s been in the NFL since 2012 and he came to Minnesota with a record of 9-15 as a starter. 24 touchdowns to 20 interceptions. A lot of what he’s been able to do in MN is system-based. And good for him to be able to run the system. But, much like the parallel with Kansas City and ‘he whose name must not be mentioned anymore on our podcast’, you know what you’re getting. So, if you want to get a different result put in the different player. But, this is more about business.
Perhaps the most contentious Rube debate of all time was the debate about the Top 5 Quarterbacks of All Time. Each Rube developed his own list and much “discussion” took place about practically every pick. You really need to listen to the episode to get the intricacies of this debate:
Mike Top 5 Quarterbacks All-Time:
Lance Top 5 Quarterbacks of All Time:
Scotty’s Terrible Take – up to a few hours before show recording, thr guys didn’t have a terrible take from anyone. Then, Scott was caught in a terrible take in a different text thread and ratted out by someone to the Rubes. In the thread, Scott said Teddy Bridgewater is very similar to Deshaun Watson. He then proceeded to compare the two quarterbacks in performance. Laughable. Deshaun exceeds Teddy’s 16-game production in less than 6-games. Enough said.
Top story lines from last weekend:
Upcoming NFL playoff implication games:
Mike Top Fantasy Defense: Denver. Dalton has thrown 8 INTs so far this season and has been stacked a whopping 25 times already this season. More sacks than he’s had in 3 complete seasons.
Lance Top Fantasy defense: Jacksonville and their top-end defense goes into Cleveland. Mike pointed out that he didn’t pick the obvious choice Like Lance did, and that he dug in deeper to find another team.
Mike Shot in the Dark – Cleveland gets its first win as it hosts a Jacksonville team that gets the gimmies in a cold, wet weather Cleveland.
Lance Shot in the Dark – Oakland is struggling with New England Patriots coming in. Take Oakland in the upset.
Locks of the week:
Mike went 1-2 and Lance went 1-1-1 last week.
Mike - Arizona at Houston, the Cardinals are favored by 1 point. Take Arizona and give up the point. Lance agrees with Mike on this one and thinks Adrian Peterson will have a great game. But, he pointed out it’s Terrible Tom Savage against Drew Stanton and that’s hardly a ‘Big Game’.
Lance – Baltimore going to Green Bay. The Packers are struggling. The Ravens have an above-average defense. Take Baltimore and the 8.5 points.
Mike - LA Rams at Minnesota, the Vikings get 2 points as the home favorite. Somebody is getting exposed in this game, and it’s Minnesota. Take the Rams and the points.
Lance – Atlanta going into Seattle. Seattle is the 3-point favorite. Atlanta Falcons exposes the Seattle Seahawks. Take Atlanta and the points.
Mike - Philly is favored by 3.5 points and on the road in Dallas without Ezekiel. Take Philly and give up the points.
Lance – takes the same game and has the same pick. Lance says it’ll be a 10-point win for Philadelphia.